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Newest Blog

Finding Value Through Faith
Friday, June 24, 2016
Denae Haas

 

By, Denae Haas 

Have you ever had a dream inside that just wouldn't go away? 

I wanted so badly to become a teacher, but fear of failure and life with my own growing family had me wait.  Finally in my thirties, I went back to school. After years of taking classes, evenings of homework at the kitchen table alongside my children, and continuing to do all the little-big-things that mommas do, I graduated from FSU, with honors. 

When I finally stepped into the classroom and role of teacher, I fell completely. In Love.  I had found something I was really good at. My peers even honored me as Teacher of the Year. What joy! In fact, my years of teaching are some of my happiest memories. I loved the moments of gathering “Mrs. Haas’ Honeybees” around the rocking chair to share a favorite story. I enjoyed being the one they came to for help, encouragement, and love. Inside that world I found a confidence I had never known.

After five years of successful teaching, I grew restless. I was ready for change. But I was afraid, and I struggled to let it go. Who would I be without being teacher?  What would I tell people I was planning to do when they asked?  I didn’t even know the answer myself. Although I wasn't sure of my value outside of being teacher, I knew I could not ignore Christ’s offer to step into a new place of faith. 

When I shed myself of position and use of my natural capabilities, the very things I had taken pride in, I realized something greater was missing.  Playing a role no longer satisfied - my soul had grown restless for more.  I desired something real and realized that it was more of Him that I wanted. 

Playing a role no longer satisfied - my soul had grown restless for more. 

So I got quiet before the Lord and asked Him to show me what He thought of me - just me, and nothing else.  In that moment I let go and surrendered everything I was, and He showed me who He was, in a way that I’d never known before.  He saturated my heart with love and let me know that it was time to stop looking to others for approval and find it in Him alone.  

In my time with Him, He showed me an image of a vintage wooden school desk, alight with a lamp, in the corner of the room.  Immediately I knew it was a place for me to write.  He led me to study about His Holy Spirit and literally taught me about Himself.  I have learned He is not frightening, He is not far-away, He is intimate, and so full of love and I must share it with the written word. That vision gave me new purpose.

Psalm 139:15-17 says, “You watched me as I was being formed in utter seclusion, as I was woven together in the dark of the womb. You saw me before I was born. Every day of my life was recorded in your book. Every moment was laid out before a single day had passed. How precious are your thoughts about me, O God. They cannot be numbered!”

Nothing satisfies our deepest needs like experiencing God lavish His love upon us.  Sometimes it takes getting to a place of desperation to be able to truly seek with our whole heart.  But when we get there, He promises that we will find Him. 

Do you hear the Spirit of the Lord calling you into a greater place of intimacy with Him?  Have you had to release something in order to find a new place of faith in Christ?

 

Join the conversation: What new dream has God placed inside of you? Have you stepped out in faith?

 


Denae Haas is a Florida girl who loves writing about Jesus and His crazy love for us!  Feel free to stop by ALavishingLife.com and say hello.